Martha Whitney, LMFT - Martha Whitney, Relationship and Life Coach

Feb

04

Courage to Face Ourselves

“The most fundamental aggression to ourselves, the most fundamental harm we can do to ourselves, is to remain ignorant by not having the courage and the respect to look at ourselves honestly and gently.”
Pema Chödrön

It is courage to turn toward ourselves. And to do this gently, without judgement and with the respect that we deserve that is another challenge. The process of Focusing helps to do this. With Focusing, we turn toward what is wanting our awareness in our own “felt sense” with gentleness and respect. A guide or companion can help us stay present and safe and be with us on the journey.

Jan

28

Appreciate Yourself

“Dare to love yourself
as if you were a rainbow
with gold at both ends.”
― Aberjhani

Jan

19

Feeling Gratitude

If you haven’t all the things you want, be grateful for the things you don’t have that you wouldn’t want.

— Unknown

I am quite taken by this reversal. There are so many things for which I am grateful that I don’t have and don’t want. I can add all these to the many things I do have and want. Ahh, Gratitude. I appreciate the feelings of gratitude.

Jan

12

Inspirational Well Wishes

“May Light always surround you; yellow flower with bee
Hope kindle and rebound you.
May your Hurts turn to Healing;
Your Heart embrace Feeling.
May Wounds become Wisdom;
Every Kindness a Prism.
May Laughter infect you;
Your Passion resurrect you.
May Goodness inspire
your Deepest Desires.
Through all that you Reach For,
May your arms Never Tire.”
― D. Simone

Jan

06

Benefits of Mindfulness in the News

Mindfulness is simply being aware in the moment and fully present. The qualities of non-judgment, curiosity, compassion and acceptance come along with this gentle practice of attention. People often find it relaxing and research shows it changes our brain. The following news brief (including commercial) is a good overview of the practice and the research:

Mindfulness on CBS News

Dec

29

Doing Something and Making Mistakes

I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes.

Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re Doing Something.

So that’s my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody’s ever made before. Don’t freeze, don’t stop, don’t worry that it isn’t good enough, or it isn’t perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life.

Whatever it is you’re scared of doing, Do it.

Make your mistakes, next year and forever.
― Neil Gaiman

A reminder from one of my favorite authors. It is OK to make mistakes. May we learn from our mistakes and continue to make them (but maybe not the same ones over and over.)

Happy New Year!

Dec

23

Conspiracy of Love

Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love.
— Hamilton Wright Mabie

May your love deepen and last. Joy, Peace and Love to all.

Dec

22

Noticing Mystery

I realized it for the first time in my life: there is nothing but mystery in the world, how it hides behind the fabric of our poor, browbeat days, shining brightly, and we don’t even know it.

― Sue Monk Kidd, The Secret Life of Bees

Mystery and miracles are there for the looking. We can look and be grateful.

Dec

09

What to Remember

candle flame “As we struggle with shopping lists and invitations, compounded by December’s bad weather, it is good to be reminded that there are people in our lives who are worth this aggravation, and people to whom we are worth the same.” – Donald E. Westlake

I feel grateful for these people as we reach out to each other, share friendship, laughter and camaraderie.

Nov

20

Between the Tigers and Appreciating the Moment

There is a story of a woman running away from tigers. She runs and runs and the tigers are getting closer and closer. When she comes to the edge of a cliff, she sees some vines there, so she climbs down and holds on to the vines. Looking down, she sees that there are tigers below her as well. She then notices that a mouse is gnawing away at the vine to which she is clinging. She also sees a beautiful little bunch of strawberries close to her, growing out of a clump of grass. She looks up and she looks down. She looks at the mouse. Then she just takes a strawberry, puts it in her mouth, and enjoys it thoroughly. Tigers above, tigers below. This is actually the predicament that we are always in, in terms of our birth and death. Each moment is just what it is. It might be the only moment of our life; it might be the only strawberry we’ll ever eat. We could get depressed about it, or we could finally appreciate it and delight in the preciousness of every single moment of our life.

Pema Chödrön, The Wisdom of No Escape: How to Love Yourself and Your World

On a daily basis we may feel like we are between tigers and we may be. This is a reminder to look for something to appreciate, to find the strawberries in our daily lives. And day after day we may need to keep looking and finding and appreciating. Thank you Pema for this reminder.

04